Vocation #1: Holography

I used to listen to this exact track all the time when I developed films in a dark room with the holograms I shot with a laser beam refraction. I put one solution in a deep tray, and I put in the film. I make sure the film is fully soaked in the solution, and disturb it a little. Sometimes I need to do this part for exactly 9 seconds. The length of time is dependent on how far your film was exposed to the laser beam refraction when it’s shot. It’s different each time. There’s an equation I used that I no longer remember.  This holography class was under my physics major requirements. The same class could count toward a physics elective or an art elective. I took it as a physics elective. 

During the 9 seconds, I couldn’t use a clock or a timer on my phone, so I played this song, and remembered 9 seconds was the flare synthesized sound coming on. I used this track as a time reference often. I’d put it on single repeat, and if I miss the beginning mark at 9 seconds, I’d just wait for it to run through the whole track, since I liked the track anyway. 

Turns out that 9-second mark was not close enough to 9 seconds, it was half a second off. Apparently the shorter the time you develop in that first solution, the more accurate the time of the development should be. For 9 seconds, it had to be exact. Though if it’s 2 minutes, you could miss a second or two without affecting the result too much. 

Then I take out the film with a tong, let the solution go from its surface. I put the film in another tray with another solution. I think I soaked the film here three times as long as the first solution. Then I take it out. I think I just let it dry on the table, I don’t remember hanging it ever, nor was there a setup for hanging developed films. It was an interesting experience for sure. At the end of the course, we had an art show, each of us had to submit a piece to it. Mine was Andy Worhol themed, with a picture of Marrilyn Moore, a crushed tomato can, and some dollar bills. The dollar bills were too light to stabilize, it moved a bit during exposure when the hologram was shot, so the film itself didn’t turn out too well. It looks a bit vague and obscure, but I kind of liked the look.

I liked coming up with a theme, finding the elements, combining them, and executing the photography. Each time it’s an open-ended question, up for interpretations, but I do have a message, from me to you, through the medium of my choice, and in this case, a hologram piece. We’d also critique each other’s work each time we met in class, which was twice a week, the rest of the time we were spending our alone time in developing rooms and photography room.

Critique, not criticize, critique. After I started working, I realized most people don’t understand the concept of critiquing a piece. It’s not about what’s bad about it, it’s never going to be perfect. It’s not about if you like it, if you’d watch it or not, it’s not about your personal preference. It’s about, if this is what this person is trying to do, is this the best way? How can we make it even closer to this person’s vision? How do we push it even further? How do we make it more interesting? That’s critiquing. 

Each week, we’d have a theme, and we’d each talk about our concept, and how we plan to execute it. We’d each give our critique if we have any. It’d never be “I don't like this” “I think if you do this it’d be better”. No no, it’s not about what you are trying to do, it’s about what she’s trying to do. She wants to make this into a screenplay, she has a concept, so how can we take that a step further, and make it even more interesting? Explosively interesting?

ChatGPT 翻译：

我以前在暗房里冲洗我用激光折射拍出来的全息胶片时，总是听这一首歌。我会把一种药水倒进深盘子里，然后把胶片放进去。我会确保胶片完全浸透在药水里，并轻轻搅动它。有时候我需要精确地搅动 9 秒。这段时间的长短取决于你拍摄时胶片受到激光折射曝光的程度。每次都不一样。我用过一个公式来算，现在已经记不清了。这门全息摄影课是我物理专业的必修课之一。这门课既可以算作物理选修课，也可以算作艺术选修课。我选它作为物理选修。

在那 9 秒里，我不能用钟表，也不能用手机计时，所以我就放这首歌，然后记住第 9 秒的时候是合成的 flare 音效响起的时刻。我经常用这首歌作为时间参考。我会把它设置为单曲循环，如果错过了第 9 秒的那个点，我就会等它完整播放一遍，反正我本来也喜欢这首歌。

结果发现第 9 秒其实不够准，它差了半秒。原来第一步药水的时间越短，对时间的准确性要求就越高。9 秒必须精确。如果是 2 分钟的话，差一两秒也不会影响太大。

然后我会用夹子把胶片拿出来，让药水从表面流走。接着我把胶片放进另一个装有不同药水的盘子里。我记得这一步我会把胶片浸泡的时间设为第一步的三倍。然后拿出来。我记得我是把它平放在桌子上晾干的，好像从没挂起来晾，也没有挂冲洗片的装置。这确实是一次很特别的体验。课程最后，我们办了一个小型艺术展，每个人都要交一件作品。我的是安迪·沃霍尔主题的，用了玛丽莲·梦露的照片、一个被压扁的番茄罐头，还有几张美元纸币。那些纸币太轻，曝光时动了一下，导致胶片效果没那么好。看起来有些模糊朦胧，但我其实挺喜欢那种效果。

我喜欢想主题、找元素、把它们组合起来，然后拍成一张作品。每一次都是一个开放式问题，有各种可能的解读，但我总是有想传达的信息，从我到你，通过我选择的媒介——这次是一个全息影像。我们每次上课也会互相讲评彼此的作品，一周两次课，剩下的时间我们就在暗房和摄影室各自独处。

是 critique，不是 criticize，是讲评。后来我开始工作了，我发现大多数人根本不懂什么是 critique 一件作品。重点不是它哪里不好，它永远不可能完美。重点也不是你喜不喜欢它、你会不会去看，它也不是关于你个人的偏好。重点是，如果这是这个人想要做的，那我们能不能让它以更好的方式呈现？我们怎么才能让它更贴近这个人的设想？我们怎么把它推进得更远？我们怎么让它更有趣？这才叫 critique。

我们每周会有一个主题，每个人会讲自己的概念，和怎么打算实现它。如果我们有 critique，就会说出来。永远不会是“我不喜欢这个”，“我觉得你这样会更好”。不不不，重点不是你想怎么做，而是她想怎么做。她想把这个做成剧本，她有一个想法，那我们怎么才能让它更进一步，让它变得更有意思？让它炸裂般地有趣？